Good day you lovely internetters doing your internetting on my bloggy bits. I have just this past moment finished my daily asshole greasing.
I know the truth about Mrs. Richard Clarks and I am willing to tell.
Saturday, 20 June, 2009
From:
This sender is DomainKeys verified
"Mrs Clark Richards" <richclarks@yahoo.com>
To: christopherkabila@ymail.com
Dear Christopher Kabila,
Your email was received and the content therein was noted. As in regards to your packaged whom Dr George Eyakwe instructed us to deliver to you,it has been packaged delivery agent agent will proceed since all the payment has been cleared by Dr George Eyakwe who told me to make sure that you have the package before Tuesday next week as the flight will leave this evening Nigeria Time.
On the other hand,bear it in mind that everything has been settlled and the delivery agent will call you immediately he arrived your country and you have to notified to him that the package under his care is an AFRICAN FABRICS as Dr George Eyakwe indicated in the delivery package been registered under our care.
I will ensure that your package will be on the list of delivery package this evening Nigeria time and it will arrived your country pending on how fast the plane is and dont hesitate to keep me posted as soon as you are in possesion of the package so that your file will be sign treated.
Don't forget to indicate your CODE immediately the delivery agent meet you in your country which is NIG/5478/AF/AD/09 because that will be the only identification of handing over the consignment to you as we are not going to held liable to for any misconstrued/handing over to the wrong person.
Kindly forward to us your phone number for the delivery man to reach you immediately they arrived USA so that you can direct him properly on how to met up with you and keep me posted once you have been in possession of the package as Dr George pleaded with me that the delivery is urgent and confidential.
Though the delivery agent promised to give me a number where you can call to know if he has arrived your country and i will send the number as soon as they are about checking in as hes busy right now handling other consignment he will be traveling along with.
Keep me posted as soon as you got this email for urgent advice.I'm Mrs Richard Clarks not (Mr)
Diplomatic Office,
2/4 Ikoyi Layout,GRA.
Lagos Nigeria.
Nigeria.
Regards,
Mrs Richard Clarks
You see the bit were this mugu says that it is 'Mrs not Mr'.- Well, this Nigerian lad has a dick but wants to be called by a lady name. That is cos he is a girly boy what wears his momma's dresses when she ain't home.
He has often asked me to touch his smelly buttocks with my manly length which I have only done because he is so simpering and not because I like doing that type of homosexually gay thing what only homosexually gay sodomites enjoy. I don't enjoy sticking my dick up this lad's asshole. Not at all. Every week I tell him I don't enjoy it because I am a real man!
Thursday, July 30, 2009
My Dirty Daddy's Sore Nutsack
My dirty daddy, as you avid followers of my highly superior blog will know and be very sorrowful indeed of, was bitten on the virile balls by a bad tempered goat he was cuddling.
His nutsack is still giving him the painful twinges of agony. My ugly momma and my slutty sister are sucking his nutsack to soothe it all day and night. It is wonderful family devotion.
I have not been bitten by a goat so I am very happy. I did poo my pants two nights ago however when i got excited at the local bar. Sadly I was wearing shorts and when I moved the poo dropped out the leg and onto the floor. I tried to pretend it wasn't there but if you have smelt the bad eggs gas...well, yeah it was very blushing for me. The girl I was chatting up didn't no longer want to have the poky-poky with me.
Better luck next time, me!
His nutsack is still giving him the painful twinges of agony. My ugly momma and my slutty sister are sucking his nutsack to soothe it all day and night. It is wonderful family devotion.
I have not been bitten by a goat so I am very happy. I did poo my pants two nights ago however when i got excited at the local bar. Sadly I was wearing shorts and when I moved the poo dropped out the leg and onto the floor. I tried to pretend it wasn't there but if you have smelt the bad eggs gas...well, yeah it was very blushing for me. The girl I was chatting up didn't no longer want to have the poky-poky with me.
Better luck next time, me!
Stupid Email from My Archive.
This is a authentic spam emailed letter an idiot sent to me some months ago. I don't know if this moron is dead by now or not. Maybe he fell asleep in a garbage bin and got thrown out into the dump? Ho ho. Good place for Mordecai!
Do other people ever get this type of very professional and convincing material emailed to them?
US Citizen Money Available
From: Mordecai Sullivan (finestmaps@circle.net)
Sent: Saturday, 7 March 2009 9:03:18 PM
To: christopherkabila@ymail.com
What a nice day is today! It is really a nice day, because you are receiving this email. We are here to help thousands of people to receive their Government Grants program and improve their ways of living.
Here, finally, is your opportunity - exactly how to apply for Government grants and what to say, step-by-step AND SEE IF YOU QUALIFY FOR A PIECE OF THE MILLIONS AND MILLIONS OF DOLLARS AWARDED EACH YEAR by private and Government grant agencies to thousands of regular people just like you. It doesn't matter if you are a male or a female, rich or poor, married or single, young or old, black or white, employed or unemployed or whatever. To make a long story short, virtually anyone can get their hands on money from the Government. And most of the money is awarded interest-free. So, unlike a bank loan, you won't see interest charges eating away at your obligations.
Better yet, there are at least 200 perfectly legal ways to get Uncle Sam to give you money when you need it most, and you'll ONLY pay back the money you receive. Believe it or not, thousands of Americans have now started to realise that the U.S. Government can be their friend.
To join our program, send an answer to 1473stylerclancy@gmail.com saying that you want to participate, and we will get back to you immediately with our proposal, so you can start in no time.
If you think this email is unwanted for you, please excuse us and just don't reply, but you will miss the chance of your life as this offer is a sincere one, risk-free, and particularly you cannot loose anything if you try it! Hurry as the offer is very limited and only the quickest will be the lucky ones!
Respect,
American Government Money program
I never did reply to Mordecai. maybe he is lonely. Maybe everyone should send their best wishes to clever Mordecai.
Do other people ever get this type of very professional and convincing material emailed to them?
US Citizen Money Available
From: Mordecai Sullivan (finestmaps@circle.net)
Sent: Saturday, 7 March 2009 9:03:18 PM
To: christopherkabila@ymail.com
What a nice day is today! It is really a nice day, because you are receiving this email. We are here to help thousands of people to receive their Government Grants program and improve their ways of living.
Here, finally, is your opportunity - exactly how to apply for Government grants and what to say, step-by-step AND SEE IF YOU QUALIFY FOR A PIECE OF THE MILLIONS AND MILLIONS OF DOLLARS AWARDED EACH YEAR by private and Government grant agencies to thousands of regular people just like you. It doesn't matter if you are a male or a female, rich or poor, married or single, young or old, black or white, employed or unemployed or whatever. To make a long story short, virtually anyone can get their hands on money from the Government. And most of the money is awarded interest-free. So, unlike a bank loan, you won't see interest charges eating away at your obligations.
Better yet, there are at least 200 perfectly legal ways to get Uncle Sam to give you money when you need it most, and you'll ONLY pay back the money you receive. Believe it or not, thousands of Americans have now started to realise that the U.S. Government can be their friend.
To join our program, send an answer to 1473stylerclancy@gmail.com saying that you want to participate, and we will get back to you immediately with our proposal, so you can start in no time.
If you think this email is unwanted for you, please excuse us and just don't reply, but you will miss the chance of your life as this offer is a sincere one, risk-free, and particularly you cannot loose anything if you try it! Hurry as the offer is very limited and only the quickest will be the lucky ones!
Respect,
American Government Money program
I never did reply to Mordecai. maybe he is lonely. Maybe everyone should send their best wishes to clever Mordecai.
Tuesday, July 28, 2009
Who is Moses Christopher?- a shalanga!
My old pal Moses Christopher is not to be trusted! He is a liar, he is a thief and worst of all he wears ladies clothings, like his favorite pink bou-bou. He evens inserts those lady things- tampons- up his ungreased asshole in case he has the girl bleeds.
He is currently working with those idiot 419 scammers. They are all very queer men who like to touch each other up and kiss on the lips.
Moses Christopher the thief, used to be one of my fuckbuddies until he got too ladylike for me. I like men to be real he-men like Arthur the Wonderful. I like to be dominated and spat on and called a dirty, filthy, worthless boy! I worship daddies!
Anyway, this fooool Moses Christopher lives in Lagos, Nigeria and is stupid. A curse on him!-orioda banza dam bu ru ba ka anu ofia shalanga.
For those millions of internetters who was thinking of asking, my dirty daddy's nutsack is still givin him awful pains but he has managed to jerk off today. Ooga be praised!
He is currently working with those idiot 419 scammers. They are all very queer men who like to touch each other up and kiss on the lips.
Moses Christopher the thief, used to be one of my fuckbuddies until he got too ladylike for me. I like men to be real he-men like Arthur the Wonderful. I like to be dominated and spat on and called a dirty, filthy, worthless boy! I worship daddies!
Anyway, this fooool Moses Christopher lives in Lagos, Nigeria and is stupid. A curse on him!-orioda banza dam bu ru ba ka anu ofia shalanga.
For those millions of internetters who was thinking of asking, my dirty daddy's nutsack is still givin him awful pains but he has managed to jerk off today. Ooga be praised!
Monday, July 27, 2009
Quality Blogging
I am the world's greatest blogger! So says Arthur the Wonderful. This is a snipping it of what he replied to my last 15 emails.
..little prick, you are a great big bugger who gives me the....
he misspelled blogger, but I know what praise he means.
Augustine is sulking. My Randy friend who tricked him on my behalf is worried about him but I told him don't waste your sympathy on that fuckwit. I hope he stays in his room sobbing his little heart out until he runs out of tissues and has to blow his nose on the drapes.
Felicia is back fro0m her working holiday. She is dog-tired. her dirty video will be available soon on taboo websites.
My dirty daddy had an awful run-in with a nasty goat what bit him on the manly balls! His sack is a-throbbing still, and looks very red and sore. What makes it worse is my stupid ugly momma went to rub ointment on it to soothe it and instead used an athletic balm.
My retarded brother had to borrow a ladder to get my dirty daddy down off the roof.
I am suffering an attack of fleas.
..little prick, you are a great big bugger who gives me the....
he misspelled blogger, but I know what praise he means.
Augustine is sulking. My Randy friend who tricked him on my behalf is worried about him but I told him don't waste your sympathy on that fuckwit. I hope he stays in his room sobbing his little heart out until he runs out of tissues and has to blow his nose on the drapes.
Felicia is back fro0m her working holiday. She is dog-tired. her dirty video will be available soon on taboo websites.
My dirty daddy had an awful run-in with a nasty goat what bit him on the manly balls! His sack is a-throbbing still, and looks very red and sore. What makes it worse is my stupid ugly momma went to rub ointment on it to soothe it and instead used an athletic balm.
My retarded brother had to borrow a ladder to get my dirty daddy down off the roof.
I am suffering an attack of fleas.
Friday, July 24, 2009
UP YOURS AUGUSTINE AKUJUAOBI !
I have masterminded a spectacular bit of fun! Ho ho ho. It is soo funny!
I got my friend , Mr. Randy, to reply to that idiot Akujuaobi alias Pastor Afu Jonatan and pretend that he was going to get money.
Slow-witted Augustine (that is also the name of one of my dirty daddy's goats) asked Randy to send him the westen union pay slip, so he has sent him a picture of some naughty young homo men pissing on their gay friend. This is adequate compensation for foolish Augustine, who will love to look at the sexy picture :)
I am such a genius to arrange all this. It is just because I truly hate Augustine Akujuaobi for his past treachery.
I was going to email a photo of my ugly momma to him to get my revenge but when I tried to scan the photo my computer blew up. God, my momma is ghastly!
I got my friend , Mr. Randy, to reply to that idiot Akujuaobi alias Pastor Afu Jonatan and pretend that he was going to get money.
Slow-witted Augustine (that is also the name of one of my dirty daddy's goats) asked Randy to send him the westen union pay slip, so he has sent him a picture of some naughty young homo men pissing on their gay friend. This is adequate compensation for foolish Augustine, who will love to look at the sexy picture :)
I am such a genius to arrange all this. It is just because I truly hate Augustine Akujuaobi for his past treachery.
I was going to email a photo of my ugly momma to him to get my revenge but when I tried to scan the photo my computer blew up. God, my momma is ghastly!
Thursday, July 23, 2009
More Phone Numbers Peoples
If you like phoning idiots here are three more good numbers to call.
Don't feel ashamed to call these nice lads, they are all internet scammers and not one of them greases his asshole!
Sir Frank Willy - +2347027705294 heh heh, as in willy - like this:
He is director of federal inland revenue board of Nigeria. As if!
Next idiot is this girly boy-
Sir James Udoma
Head,Foreign Opt. Dept.
Unity Bank Nigeria Plc
Direct Telephone:+234-1-7632059
and his photo:
and then the biggest dickhead of the bunch!
Engineer John Akin Williams,
Department of Budget and Planning
Ministry of Petroleum,
Lagos-Nigeria
Tel: +234-802-842-0136
that lad really been sniffing the gas fumes at the petroluem ministry me thinks.
Don't feel ashamed to call these nice lads, they are all internet scammers and not one of them greases his asshole!
Sir Frank Willy - +2347027705294 heh heh, as in willy - like this:
He is director of federal inland revenue board of Nigeria. As if!
Next idiot is this girly boy-
Sir James Udoma
Head,Foreign Opt. Dept.
Unity Bank Nigeria Plc
Direct Telephone:+234-1-7632059
and his photo:
and then the biggest dickhead of the bunch!
Engineer John Akin Williams,
Department of Budget and Planning
Ministry of Petroleum,
Lagos-Nigeria
Tel: +234-802-842-0136
that lad really been sniffing the gas fumes at the petroluem ministry me thinks.
Lipstick on Goats
My dirty daddy is putting pink lipstick on his goats. Only the girl ones of course, he is not kinky. The boy goats are having cologne splashed on their smelly bits.
I just made a phone call to a twerp. It was to Pastor Jonatan. He sounds like my retarded brother. He kept trying to talk using big words but he got confused by them and started babbling like a monkey trying to eat a coconut.
His phone number is +225-08-58-21-94. He likes to receive dirty phone calls from people asking him to take down his pink lacy panties and grease his own asshole.
Don't be shy - give him a call so he don't get lonely.
Here is my final message for you Jonatan - GET LEPROSY TODAY!
I just made a phone call to a twerp. It was to Pastor Jonatan. He sounds like my retarded brother. He kept trying to talk using big words but he got confused by them and started babbling like a monkey trying to eat a coconut.
His phone number is +225-08-58-21-94. He likes to receive dirty phone calls from people asking him to take down his pink lacy panties and grease his own asshole.
Don't be shy - give him a call so he don't get lonely.
Here is my final message for you Jonatan - GET LEPROSY TODAY!
Wednesday, July 22, 2009
At Home With My Family
I am having a lazy day at home with my family.
We have heard from Felicia, she is having a terrible time in Sao Paulo. She is in the slums, and it is full of druggies, scammers and Rush Limbaugh fans. She has met the co-star of her film,and taken him for a walk.
She says she will be glad to get home and back to her usual street-walking.
My ugly momma is still very ugly.
My dirty daddy is out back with a pretty goat and a bottle of Dom Perignon bubbly booze. He is getting the goat drunk so that he can do his dirty thing.
My retarded brother is stuck in the linen cupboard, where he has been for the past two days.
I am eating cheese and greasing my asshole and dreaming of Arthur the Wonderful. Life is beautiful.
Two children next door died of typhus this morning and my old granny fell off the roof while trying to hit aeroplanes with her broom. It is nice cheese I am nibbling. tastes a bit like Felicia's underwear.
We have heard from Felicia, she is having a terrible time in Sao Paulo. She is in the slums, and it is full of druggies, scammers and Rush Limbaugh fans. She has met the co-star of her film,and taken him for a walk.
She says she will be glad to get home and back to her usual street-walking.
My ugly momma is still very ugly.
My dirty daddy is out back with a pretty goat and a bottle of Dom Perignon bubbly booze. He is getting the goat drunk so that he can do his dirty thing.
My retarded brother is stuck in the linen cupboard, where he has been for the past two days.
I am eating cheese and greasing my asshole and dreaming of Arthur the Wonderful. Life is beautiful.
Two children next door died of typhus this morning and my old granny fell off the roof while trying to hit aeroplanes with her broom. It is nice cheese I am nibbling. tastes a bit like Felicia's underwear.
Tuesday, July 21, 2009
LOTTERY LUCK!!!
HOLY SHIT! Ihave won a fortune just for having an email address that any idiot can access! I am so damn lucky. Lucky, ,lucky me. I will be able to buy a pair of trousers that are not piss-stained and with brown smears at the back.
Your e-mail address have just won you One Hundred And Fifty thousand Euros
only(150.000.00)at the SPANISH EURO MILLION 2009 Lottery Promotion
Contact this office for more details:
Mr Lopez Aguila.
Tel.+34-672-841-313.
Email:(spainisheuromil@aol.com)
Once again Congratulations from members of Euro Million Lottery Promotions Spain
Sincerely Yours
Mrs.Jeniffer Sanchez
Publications Department
Email:euromillagents@aol.com
Please Keep this winning numbers confidential to avoid double claims,and you
must quote it in your response.
Ref: E.M.L.P.S/19740101
Batch:10000098902
Ticket Serial:Number 0891/EML 09
Please do not try and contact this fine lady before I gets the money will you?
I bet she has pretty titties :,)
Your e-mail address have just won you One Hundred And Fifty thousand Euros
only(150.000.00)at the SPANISH EURO MILLION 2009 Lottery Promotion
Contact this office for more details:
Mr Lopez Aguila.
Tel.+34-672-841-313.
Email:(spainisheuromil@aol.com)
Once again Congratulations from members of Euro Million Lottery Promotions Spain
Sincerely Yours
Mrs.Jeniffer Sanchez
Publications Department
Email:euromillagents@aol.com
Please Keep this winning numbers confidential to avoid double claims,and you
must quote it in your response.
Ref: E.M.L.P.S/19740101
Batch:10000098902
Ticket Serial:Number 0891/EML 09
Please do not try and contact this fine lady before I gets the money will you?
I bet she has pretty titties :,)
John Gezi and Kevin Oga
Due to thoughts I am pissed off, so pissed that I could piss higher up the wall than any of the other lads in the back alley of the internets cafe. That pissed off!
All because of that horrible fooool John Gezi and his odious boyfriend, the deformed Mr. Kevin Oga. Hah mister, missus is more true. Very limp in wrist and dick!
When I was just a young rascal these two had me turning tricks with dirty old men who like some soft hairless boy bum. They was paying me only 5% of the money I earned and they told me I was getting 50%. I thought the johns were just cheap shits, but it was Gezi and Oga!
Kevin Oga is the biggest pimp in Africa, and runs the world's most diseased wet sex dungeon for kinky peoples. He loves nothing better than to be peed on. I am so pissed off with them i would drown that bastard in my bladder water if I saw him now!
They are also scammers. Don't let them trick you into giving them money, or paying for VD riddled whores or inferior piss sex.
This is Kevin's phone number - +2348084397323. He talks like an idiot, it is funny to hear him babble. Call him up and tell him he is a cheap bastard.
Or give Gezi an email @ johngezi@ymail.com
Damn. I have wet myself while sitting here. Everybody is pointing and giggling. Oh GO FUCK YOURSELVES WITH A SPLINTERY POST!
All because of that horrible fooool John Gezi and his odious boyfriend, the deformed Mr. Kevin Oga. Hah mister, missus is more true. Very limp in wrist and dick!
When I was just a young rascal these two had me turning tricks with dirty old men who like some soft hairless boy bum. They was paying me only 5% of the money I earned and they told me I was getting 50%. I thought the johns were just cheap shits, but it was Gezi and Oga!
Kevin Oga is the biggest pimp in Africa, and runs the world's most diseased wet sex dungeon for kinky peoples. He loves nothing better than to be peed on. I am so pissed off with them i would drown that bastard in my bladder water if I saw him now!
They are also scammers. Don't let them trick you into giving them money, or paying for VD riddled whores or inferior piss sex.
This is Kevin's phone number - +2348084397323. He talks like an idiot, it is funny to hear him babble. Call him up and tell him he is a cheap bastard.
Or give Gezi an email @ johngezi@ymail.com
Damn. I have wet myself while sitting here. Everybody is pointing and giggling. Oh GO FUCK YOURSELVES WITH A SPLINTERY POST!
My Favorite Dildock
I am elastic. I am so happy because my best friend in the internets and potential gay husband, Arthur the Wonderful finally replied after the 54 emails I have sent him in the last week.
He sent me a love note in the form of a poem.
MY FAVORITE DILDOCK
Kabila, you are a tool,
I know no greater fool.
Your scamming is bad,
You're making me sad,
I say with a weary sigh
"Oh, why don you go die?"
Isn't it heartfelt. I am not one for understanding the centimetrics of verse metres but I think he means he wants my tool, that fools fall in love, that he is sorrowing in missing me and would rather die than live without me. I feels the same things he feels.
What is a dildock? I don't know but if Arthur the Wonderful says I am a dildock I am a dildock!
He sent me a love note in the form of a poem.
MY FAVORITE DILDOCK
Kabila, you are a tool,
I know no greater fool.
Your scamming is bad,
You're making me sad,
I say with a weary sigh
"Oh, why don you go die?"
Isn't it heartfelt. I am not one for understanding the centimetrics of verse metres but I think he means he wants my tool, that fools fall in love, that he is sorrowing in missing me and would rather die than live without me. I feels the same things he feels.
What is a dildock? I don't know but if Arthur the Wonderful says I am a dildock I am a dildock!
Monday, July 20, 2009
Augustine Ifeanyi Akujuaobi
SPEAKING OF PIG SHIT.
This man is the biggest collector of manure in Ivory Coast. He has it heaped up to the walls of his house, and in bags in his rooms. He uses a bag of cow shit as his pillow.
His name is Augustine Ifeanyi Akujuaobi of 120 capital building 14th floor rue de commerce plateau Abidjan.
In his spare time he is a 419 scammer. He is the homosexual lover of Deacon Chukwudi and John Gezi. He would like to receive dirty letters from sexy men. Please do send him lots of letters.
He says that I am a bad person. Hah! At least I don't make my family live in poo.-They do it of their own choice, especially my dirty daddy.
This man is the biggest collector of manure in Ivory Coast. He has it heaped up to the walls of his house, and in bags in his rooms. He uses a bag of cow shit as his pillow.
His name is Augustine Ifeanyi Akujuaobi of 120 capital building 14th floor rue de commerce plateau Abidjan.
In his spare time he is a 419 scammer. He is the homosexual lover of Deacon Chukwudi and John Gezi. He would like to receive dirty letters from sexy men. Please do send him lots of letters.
He says that I am a bad person. Hah! At least I don't make my family live in poo.-They do it of their own choice, especially my dirty daddy.
Very sick, pray for me.
Oh, I am very, very ill today.
I have swine poo. yes, that is right, swine poo. My shit is coming out like pig poo and smells like a dirty pig sty. It is appalling everybody here and they are pinching their noses and saying, "Oh good grief!"
It is contagious and soon everybody in the entire world might have this terrible condition!! Imagine the stink! Oooo.
But before everybodies panics check you emails because I am sure that scammers have the cure for this terrible condition, as well as being able to lengthen your penis and make you rich. Those lads are geniuses.
I have swine poo. yes, that is right, swine poo. My shit is coming out like pig poo and smells like a dirty pig sty. It is appalling everybody here and they are pinching their noses and saying, "Oh good grief!"
It is contagious and soon everybody in the entire world might have this terrible condition!! Imagine the stink! Oooo.
But before everybodies panics check you emails because I am sure that scammers have the cure for this terrible condition, as well as being able to lengthen your penis and make you rich. Those lads are geniuses.
Sunday, July 19, 2009
Felicia on Holiday
Hello again everybodies.
My sister Felicia has gone on a working holiday to Sao Paulo, a city in Brazil, which has many weirdo people infesting it and spoiling it for all the nice people there. One of these weirdoes is Mr. Snatchez who she is escorting and working for.
She is giving him the good sex on the trip over and at his palatial hovel. Also she is going to be a movie star in the movies Mr. Snatchez makes. His last epic was Horse Fucking Whores, the sequel to his masterpiece Dog Fucking Bitches.
Felicia will be perfect for these zoophile movies. My dirty daddy wanted to know if Mr. Snatchez wanted to film him pestering the goats but Mr. Snatchez said my dirty daddy was an ugly old bastard who made him want to vomit. He actually did vomit when he caught a microsecond glimpse of part of my ugly momma's hideous face.
Have a lovely time in Sao Paulo Felicia!
My sister Felicia has gone on a working holiday to Sao Paulo, a city in Brazil, which has many weirdo people infesting it and spoiling it for all the nice people there. One of these weirdoes is Mr. Snatchez who she is escorting and working for.
She is giving him the good sex on the trip over and at his palatial hovel. Also she is going to be a movie star in the movies Mr. Snatchez makes. His last epic was Horse Fucking Whores, the sequel to his masterpiece Dog Fucking Bitches.
Felicia will be perfect for these zoophile movies. My dirty daddy wanted to know if Mr. Snatchez wanted to film him pestering the goats but Mr. Snatchez said my dirty daddy was an ugly old bastard who made him want to vomit. He actually did vomit when he caught a microsecond glimpse of part of my ugly momma's hideous face.
Have a lovely time in Sao Paulo Felicia!
Saturday, July 18, 2009
More about Gezi
John Gezi was last seen with this prostitute boy, christian ngbeken, at this address:
149 odozi street bojiboji agbor delta state nigeria.
He was suckin his dick, rimmin' his asshole (ungreased) and jerking off all over the place. Just the thought of it makes me want to go and visit smuttystuff or daddysbadboys- I am am a bad boy. if only Arthur the wonderful would be my daddy. *sigh-brokenheart* I go jerk off and eat my cum.
149 odozi street bojiboji agbor delta state nigeria.
He was suckin his dick, rimmin' his asshole (ungreased) and jerking off all over the place. Just the thought of it makes me want to go and visit smuttystuff or daddysbadboys- I am am a bad boy. if only Arthur the wonderful would be my daddy. *sigh-brokenheart* I go jerk off and eat my cum.
John Gezi
I have not forgotten that I promised to tell you the whole disgusting truth about that bastard, John Gezi. Well he makes me so spurting angry that I can't type the words today. But I will soon.
Also why did I not take a job with the laughable Fang Lee. Well, for one I am too damn lazy, secondly I am too stupid for him to employ. So he says. Poo!!
Also why did I not take a job with the laughable Fang Lee. Well, for one I am too damn lazy, secondly I am too stupid for him to employ. So he says. Poo!!
Need a Job?
Are you a jobless boy?
Pancaindra Resources (Textile Inc) is a good employer to work for. Located in cyberspace, on the corner of Rip-off Road and Bullshit Blvd.
You don't get any salary but the boss, one Mr. Fang Lee (Fangy) is a complete fucking idiot!
His secretary, Miss. April Seniuk is one hot bit of tail let me tell you! She is a nympho and always hot for it. She gives out to any man she meets. She do it with little boy scouts and wrinkled old prunes in wheelchairs and anybody in between!
Give ol' Fangy an email at hangleeiwe1@yahoo.cn and say that Arthur the Wonderful recommends you. Arthur was working for Fang Lee and was his best employee, until he and Cuthbert the gray alien and Jack Twist opened up their gold mine on Brokeback Mountain.
Remind Fangy that he still has not gone to Butte to collect his $5,000 prize for fucking a cow. It is still on offer!
Here is the many marvelous bonuses you get, well you don't get, but if you are a $ucker get used to disappointment, man!
OTHER BONUSES!!!
1) Housing loan upto after third payment confirmation $600,000 with
discounted interest
3) Car Loan upto after third payment confirmation $80,000 with discounted
INterest
4) Performance based bonus upto 6 months
5) Company wide Bonus of upto 4 months
To this Email: hangleeiwe1@yahoo.cn
Kindest Regards,
Mr.Fang Lee
Company Directors.
PANCAINDRA RESOURCES SDN BHD
Good ol' Fangy. The man who invented the word upto. What a he-goatfucker! Arthur is still annoyed that he never got his bonus, nor his nude pictures of April Seniuk, or a reference in PDF format ONLY!
Pancaindra Resources (Textile Inc) is a good employer to work for. Located in cyberspace, on the corner of Rip-off Road and Bullshit Blvd.
You don't get any salary but the boss, one Mr. Fang Lee (Fangy) is a complete fucking idiot!
His secretary, Miss. April Seniuk is one hot bit of tail let me tell you! She is a nympho and always hot for it. She gives out to any man she meets. She do it with little boy scouts and wrinkled old prunes in wheelchairs and anybody in between!
Give ol' Fangy an email at hangleeiwe1@yahoo.cn and say that Arthur the Wonderful recommends you. Arthur was working for Fang Lee and was his best employee, until he and Cuthbert the gray alien and Jack Twist opened up their gold mine on Brokeback Mountain.
Remind Fangy that he still has not gone to Butte to collect his $5,000 prize for fucking a cow. It is still on offer!
Here is the many marvelous bonuses you get, well you don't get, but if you are a $ucker get used to disappointment, man!
OTHER BONUSES!!!
1) Housing loan upto after third payment confirmation $600,000 with
discounted interest
3) Car Loan upto after third payment confirmation $80,000 with discounted
INterest
4) Performance based bonus upto 6 months
5) Company wide Bonus of upto 4 months
To this Email: hangleeiwe1@yahoo.cn
Kindest Regards,
Mr.Fang Lee
Company Directors.
PANCAINDRA RESOURCES SDN BHD
Good ol' Fangy. The man who invented the word upto. What a he-goatfucker! Arthur is still annoyed that he never got his bonus, nor his nude pictures of April Seniuk, or a reference in PDF format ONLY!
Friday, July 17, 2009
Pastor Jonatan and Deacon Chukwudi
These two incompetent foools are gay lovers! Yes, it is true. They wear lady dresses and have false boobies and fondle each other in toilets. I have often many times seen them going at it.
By the way, I have stinky breath today.
However as for that fuckwit Afu Jonatan, he can drop dead. Deacon Chukwudi however is a very sexy man who I long to suck off. I hate Pastor Jonatan for getting all the best sex out of horny Deacon Chukwudi. Not even a threesome will that selfish bastard allow.
DIE IN HELL AFU JONATAN.
Everybody else have a nice day and enjoy a cup of coffee.
By the way, I have stinky breath today.
However as for that fuckwit Afu Jonatan, he can drop dead. Deacon Chukwudi however is a very sexy man who I long to suck off. I hate Pastor Jonatan for getting all the best sex out of horny Deacon Chukwudi. Not even a threesome will that selfish bastard allow.
DIE IN HELL AFU JONATAN.
Everybody else have a nice day and enjoy a cup of coffee.
George might be dead!!
Well. George Poyser is not replying on either of the email addresses I posted on this blog. Is he dead of shame? Did a headhunter catch him and take his head? Did he go into hospital for a lobotomy and they failed to find his brain?
------WHO CARES?
Good riddance and fuck you George. I hope all the mugus who you had dangling ready to send you money don't get to send it to you now. Ha ha. Eat shit and die, as my friend Arthur the Wonderful often tells me.
------WHO CARES?
Good riddance and fuck you George. I hope all the mugus who you had dangling ready to send you money don't get to send it to you now. Ha ha. Eat shit and die, as my friend Arthur the Wonderful often tells me.
Family News
For all those many, many peoples who were asking - Margie and Ragnar,
My dirty daddy is just fine. Arthur the Wonderful has promised my dirty daddy 20 virgin goats dowry if he allows him to wed my slutty sister, Felicia.
My dirty daddy has been bouncin' off the walls with excitement at the thought of all those sweet, virginal goats.
I wish Arthur the Wonderful would marry me. he has a very big dick and I am a terrible size-queen. I cannot go past the stables without admiring the big horsey dicks. Arthur's is almost as big as that!
As for my ugly momma she is even uglier than before as another huge hairy wart has grown on her bulbous, pimply nose. I vomited into my dinner last night when she chucked it at me from the kitchen. So I swapped it for my retarded brothers while he was busy drawing a picture of Ronald Reagan's doormat.
Well, I must go and spread the doctrine of asshole greasing throughout the land. Soon I shall tell you all about my horrid ex-lover and pimp, John Gezi. He is a vile man. Damn you Gezi, damn you to Hades!
My dirty daddy is just fine. Arthur the Wonderful has promised my dirty daddy 20 virgin goats dowry if he allows him to wed my slutty sister, Felicia.
My dirty daddy has been bouncin' off the walls with excitement at the thought of all those sweet, virginal goats.
I wish Arthur the Wonderful would marry me. he has a very big dick and I am a terrible size-queen. I cannot go past the stables without admiring the big horsey dicks. Arthur's is almost as big as that!
As for my ugly momma she is even uglier than before as another huge hairy wart has grown on her bulbous, pimply nose. I vomited into my dinner last night when she chucked it at me from the kitchen. So I swapped it for my retarded brothers while he was busy drawing a picture of Ronald Reagan's doormat.
Well, I must go and spread the doctrine of asshole greasing throughout the land. Soon I shall tell you all about my horrid ex-lover and pimp, John Gezi. He is a vile man. Damn you Gezi, damn you to Hades!
Thursday, July 16, 2009
I am a fucking genius!
This was my princely email to the $ucker$. It is so believable, don't everybody get random emails from royalty offering them immense wealth?
I am a fucking genius!
From; Prince Chris Kabila.
Johannesburg,South Africa.
TEL:27-73-172-7100.
E-mail:pck2_197@yahoo.co.uk
THE DIRECTOR/CEO.
BUSINESS INVESTMENT OPPORTUNITY & FUNDS MANAGEMENT
SIR,
THIS MAY APPEAR A BIT SURPRISING TO YOU BUT AS A
MATTER OF URGENCY I AM DESPERATELY LOOKING FOR A
FORIGN PARTNER WHOM I CAN TRUST TO HANDLE SOME
INVESTMENT OR FUND MOVEMENT.
I HAVE ABOUT $15.4 MILLION UNITED STATE DOLLARS
LODGED WITH A PRIVATE COMPANY IN JOHANNESBURG SOUTH
AFRICA.I HAVE BEEN ADVISED TO EITHER TRANSFER THIS
FUND OUT OR INVEST IT IN YOUR COMPANY.
IF YOU ARE INTERESTED, INFORM ME OF AN INVESTMENT
AGENT/LINK OR IF YOU WANT MY FUNDS INVESTED IN YOUR
COMPANY IN FORM OF PARTNERSHIP,DO CONTACT ME ON THE
ABOVE PRIVATE NUMBER,STATING YOUR MODALITIES AND
OPTIONS.
MORE DETAILS ON THIS TRANSACTION WILL REACH YOU IF
ANY GENUINE INTEREST IS SHOWN.
BEST REGARDS.
PRINCE CHRIS KABILA.
I am a fucking genius!
From; Prince Chris Kabila.
Johannesburg,South Africa.
TEL:27-73-172-7100.
E-mail:pck2_197@yahoo.co.uk
THE DIRECTOR/CEO.
BUSINESS INVESTMENT OPPORTUNITY & FUNDS MANAGEMENT
SIR,
THIS MAY APPEAR A BIT SURPRISING TO YOU BUT AS A
MATTER OF URGENCY I AM DESPERATELY LOOKING FOR A
FORIGN PARTNER WHOM I CAN TRUST TO HANDLE SOME
INVESTMENT OR FUND MOVEMENT.
I HAVE ABOUT $15.4 MILLION UNITED STATE DOLLARS
LODGED WITH A PRIVATE COMPANY IN JOHANNESBURG SOUTH
AFRICA.I HAVE BEEN ADVISED TO EITHER TRANSFER THIS
FUND OUT OR INVEST IT IN YOUR COMPANY.
IF YOU ARE INTERESTED, INFORM ME OF AN INVESTMENT
AGENT/LINK OR IF YOU WANT MY FUNDS INVESTED IN YOUR
COMPANY IN FORM OF PARTNERSHIP,DO CONTACT ME ON THE
ABOVE PRIVATE NUMBER,STATING YOUR MODALITIES AND
OPTIONS.
MORE DETAILS ON THIS TRANSACTION WILL REACH YOU IF
ANY GENUINE INTEREST IS SHOWN.
BEST REGARDS.
PRINCE CHRIS KABILA.
I know these lads!
Hello again all you credulous, well-kempt people.
I was surfing the internets which are on the cafe's PCs looking for any naughty pictures of nude men with no clothes on when I found this page, which sadly though it has no stiff dickies has the names of many of my friends on it.
Check it out at : http://www.nigerianscams.org/x_letters.htm
The page even has one of my letters on it! Wow, it is exciting to be world-famous. If you were not so ordinary you too could experience this feeling I have in my little intestine. ---- oh, my error, i just farted. It was the gas. Oh, it was a wet, smelly one too. The man next to me just punched my arm and told me I smelt like a hippos twat.
------Hey, al-Haji, how comes it you know what a hippo twat smells like???
Hmmmmm.
I was surfing the internets which are on the cafe's PCs looking for any naughty pictures of nude men with no clothes on when I found this page, which sadly though it has no stiff dickies has the names of many of my friends on it.
Check it out at : http://www.nigerianscams.org/x_letters.htm
The page even has one of my letters on it! Wow, it is exciting to be world-famous. If you were not so ordinary you too could experience this feeling I have in my little intestine. ---- oh, my error, i just farted. It was the gas. Oh, it was a wet, smelly one too. The man next to me just punched my arm and told me I smelt like a hippos twat.
------Hey, al-Haji, how comes it you know what a hippo twat smells like???
Hmmmmm.
What nice emails you send me- send more
Hello my lovely fans! I send you all a big wet sloppy kiss and wish you all well-greased assholes for eternity!
I love your emails, keep them coming! Except for you foooolish scammers who have been calling me wicked names like Stinkybum and Goat-fuckers son and son of a goat-fucker and Goober Ears. I do not like these instituations!
I have found the Lord, through the evangelism of the most pious Reverend Cheeseprong of Saint Littleboys Church of the Immaculate Touch , and my seat in heaven is assured for my well-greased asshole. So when you all screaming in the Satan's piss-pot of hell being poked in tender regions by demons with pointy pitchforks don't blub to me about it you 419 foools. Repent now! And grease your assholes in submission to the will of the Almighty.
Amen!!!!!!!!!!!
I love your emails, keep them coming! Except for you foooolish scammers who have been calling me wicked names like Stinkybum and Goat-fuckers son and son of a goat-fucker and Goober Ears. I do not like these instituations!
I have found the Lord, through the evangelism of the most pious Reverend Cheeseprong of Saint Littleboys Church of the Immaculate Touch , and my seat in heaven is assured for my well-greased asshole. So when you all screaming in the Satan's piss-pot of hell being poked in tender regions by demons with pointy pitchforks don't blub to me about it you 419 foools. Repent now! And grease your assholes in submission to the will of the Almighty.
Amen!!!!!!!!!!!
George Has A Secret.
Hello. Lovely day my good buddies on the end of the internet cable.
Let me tell you, George Poyser has a secret. No, its nothing to do with the ladies underwear he wears, or the photos of wrinkly old ladies he has hidden under his mattress or his fondness for rifling through garbage cans looking for used sanitary napkins to add to his collection.
George is an internet scammer! My friend, I.M.Anasshole, received this email today:
DEPARTMENT OF FINANCE & ECONOMIC AFFAIRS
JOHANNEBURG,SOUTH AFRICA
Tel: +27-833614479
Email: georgepsr758@gmail.com
I plead with you on one issue, whether you are interested or not, kindly do not expose this information to any one else. I confirm that the transaction is legitimate and without any risks either to us or yourself. Please, give me your response immediately by returning this mail through my alternative email address. georgepsr758@gmail.com
Oh ho ho! What a fibber! George does not work for the finance department. George sweeps the floor at the local whorehouse and scams. He has IQ of about 11.5.
Please do not expose this information as it would piss him off immensely.
Here is an alternative email for George the condom cleaner, georgepoyser123@gmail.com
Please do send him emails or try the phone number and have a nice chat with this lad.
Let me tell you, George Poyser has a secret. No, its nothing to do with the ladies underwear he wears, or the photos of wrinkly old ladies he has hidden under his mattress or his fondness for rifling through garbage cans looking for used sanitary napkins to add to his collection.
George is an internet scammer! My friend, I.M.Anasshole, received this email today:
DEPARTMENT OF FINANCE & ECONOMIC AFFAIRS
JOHANNEBURG,SOUTH AFRICA
Tel: +27-833614479
Email: georgepsr758@gmail.com
I plead with you on one issue, whether you are interested or not, kindly do not expose this information to any one else. I confirm that the transaction is legitimate and without any risks either to us or yourself. Please, give me your response immediately by returning this mail through my alternative email address. georgepsr758@gmail.com
Oh ho ho! What a fibber! George does not work for the finance department. George sweeps the floor at the local whorehouse and scams. He has IQ of about 11.5.
Please do not expose this information as it would piss him off immensely.
Here is an alternative email for George the condom cleaner, georgepoyser123@gmail.com
Please do send him emails or try the phone number and have a nice chat with this lad.
Wednesday, July 15, 2009
How much wood would a Chukwudi chuck?
This summary is not available. Please
click here to view the post.
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
Nice lady wants your money
If you are a lonely man with a few dollar$ in your bank account then this nice "lady", Susan Koffi-
ksusan0044@yahoo.co.jp
would like to relieve you of it.
My sister Felicia and Susan Koffi used to work the same street corner selling their sexiness. So I have it on first hand account that Susan is in fact a man who dresses up like a female woman. he is a so-called Transsiberianite, or crossed-dresser. (In French lacrosse-dresser)
So beware any lonely men with well-exercised wrists, if you get a luscious email from Susan. She has a dick! Not a very big one but it is there.
ksusan0044@yahoo.co.jp
would like to relieve you of it.
My sister Felicia and Susan Koffi used to work the same street corner selling their sexiness. So I have it on first hand account that Susan is in fact a man who dresses up like a female woman. he is a so-called Transsiberianite, or crossed-dresser. (In French lacrosse-dresser)
So beware any lonely men with well-exercised wrists, if you get a luscious email from Susan. She has a dick! Not a very big one but it is there.
Brazilian Wingnut
I have received an email from a simpleton.
This Brazilian bimbo dont know who da fuck Warren Buffet is. Even a simple lad from Lagos like me know that a warren buffet is turbulence in a rabbit hole.
Warrent Buffer insights
Ericka Glassford
nameth1979@newscomunicacao.com.br
This Ericka is thick. She is probably one of those nasty Brazilian gals what does the dirty business with dogs on those videos my dirty daddy imports into Nigeria.
FUCK YOU ERICKA! I am too important and busy to waste time on your bullshit.
This Brazilian bimbo dont know who da fuck Warren Buffet is. Even a simple lad from Lagos like me know that a warren buffet is turbulence in a rabbit hole.
Warrent Buffer insights
Ericka Glassford
nameth1979@newscomunicacao.com.br
This Ericka is thick. She is probably one of those nasty Brazilian gals what does the dirty business with dogs on those videos my dirty daddy imports into Nigeria.
FUCK YOU ERICKA! I am too important and busy to waste time on your bullshit.
Felicia is in Love
My sister Felicia is in love with Arthur the Wonderful. She told me last night while we had sex that I do not satisfy her anymore and that she wants to marry Arthur, because he is so wonderful.
I asked her what the fuck is so wonderful about him?
She said he showers at least once a day. I said "So he wastes water, but what's good about him?"
She said he doesn't snore while she's having an orgasm. I said "I don't snore, I am fast asleep as soon as I cum."
She said he won't send me out to work as a whore like you and our dirty daddy do. So I replied, "Hah. He sounds terrible,he wants you to stay at home and not enjoy a career!"
Felicia is so stoopid when it comes to men!
I don't want her to marry Arthur the Wonderful. Because I want to marry him!!
I asked her what the fuck is so wonderful about him?
She said he showers at least once a day. I said "So he wastes water, but what's good about him?"
She said he doesn't snore while she's having an orgasm. I said "I don't snore, I am fast asleep as soon as I cum."
She said he won't send me out to work as a whore like you and our dirty daddy do. So I replied, "Hah. He sounds terrible,he wants you to stay at home and not enjoy a career!"
Felicia is so stoopid when it comes to men!
I don't want her to marry Arthur the Wonderful. Because I want to marry him!!
Monday, July 13, 2009
Pastor Jonatan is a Jerkoff !
There is a bastard calling himself Pastor Afu Jonatan. I think the afu is an acronym for All fucked up (in da head!) This prick is not a pastor, he is a shitmunching, pig-fucking liar. Filthy son -of-a-whore. My dirty daddy gave his momma 10c for a fuck and she gave him change cos she is so cheap. This Afu Jonatan doesn't like Nigerians. he says they are all evil. Well he is a cunt full of diarrhoea!
He is a 419 scammer, i have seen him in the internet cafe. he has flies buzzing around him because he stinks from never washing or wiping his filthy asshole (which he neglects entirely to grease!) and everybody avoids him. He is a stupid, ugly man. Monkeys scream in fright when they see him. He lives in a tin shed.
FUCK YOU AFU JONATAN!
Please email this shithead fuckwit and tell him to go back to giving blowjobs to goat herders to earn money. His email is:
He is a 419 scammer, i have seen him in the internet cafe. he has flies buzzing around him because he stinks from never washing or wiping his filthy asshole (which he neglects entirely to grease!) and everybody avoids him. He is a stupid, ugly man. Monkeys scream in fright when they see him. He lives in a tin shed.
FUCK YOU AFU JONATAN!
Please email this shithead fuckwit and tell him to go back to giving blowjobs to goat herders to earn money. His email is:
afu_jonatan@yahoo.co.jp
Sunday, July 12, 2009
Friendly Advice.
I have had a change of heart since I received an email from Reverend Cheeseprong of Saint Littleboys Church of the Immaculate Touch.
For some years now I have been a dirty rotten 419 scam guyman. But no more!
I want to tell you nice people on the end of the internet cable that you must be careful of lads writing you emails about cocoa merchants, trunks of money and lovely girls who want the nookie real bad.
These are tricks. You could not tell this, because they are so devilishly clever and cunning and how they ever get suspected at all is a total mystery.
I suggest that see sites like:
www.thescambaiter.com
www.419eater.com
www.419scam.org
www.scambuster419.co.uk
www.ebolamonkeyman.com -- (very funny!)
scambaiterhaven.blogspot.com
I am going to inform on all my past partners in crime but don't let them know that! They are very wicked boys who might give me a wet willy! My dirty daddy says that I should stick to a life of crime because I am no fucking use for anything else but what would that old goat-fucker know? He was stupid enough to marry my ugly momma!
For some years now I have been a dirty rotten 419 scam guyman. But no more!
I want to tell you nice people on the end of the internet cable that you must be careful of lads writing you emails about cocoa merchants, trunks of money and lovely girls who want the nookie real bad.
These are tricks. You could not tell this, because they are so devilishly clever and cunning and how they ever get suspected at all is a total mystery.
I suggest that see sites like:
www.thescambaiter.com
www.419eater.com
www.419scam.org
www.scambuster419.co.uk
www.ebolamonkeyman.com -- (very funny!)
scambaiterhaven.blogspot.com
I am going to inform on all my past partners in crime but don't let them know that! They are very wicked boys who might give me a wet willy! My dirty daddy says that I should stick to a life of crime because I am no fucking use for anything else but what would that old goat-fucker know? He was stupid enough to marry my ugly momma!
Arthur is Being Naughty
My friend, Arthur the Wonderful is being very naughty indeed. I have told him over and over how much I admire and cherish, even worship him due to his vast intelligence and stunning good looks. He is like a living god!
But alas for my poor broken heart he has told me that he loves Liberace Hitler more then me.
THE BITCH!
So I have told him that if he does not do as I ask I shall have a witchdoctor put a curse on him! That should scare him my way! The witchdoctor is very powerful. For such a talented spellcaster i don't know why he lives poverty-stricken in a mud hut with arthritis and two teeth left in his mouth, but I guess it is just because he does not want to use his incredible magic to enrich himself.
I will keep you posted on my love life.
But alas for my poor broken heart he has told me that he loves Liberace Hitler more then me.
THE BITCH!
So I have told him that if he does not do as I ask I shall have a witchdoctor put a curse on him! That should scare him my way! The witchdoctor is very powerful. For such a talented spellcaster i don't know why he lives poverty-stricken in a mud hut with arthritis and two teeth left in his mouth, but I guess it is just because he does not want to use his incredible magic to enrich himself.
I will keep you posted on my love life.
Saturday, July 11, 2009
Hello World
I have asked my dear friend Arthur the Wonderful for advice on getting lots and lots of nice readers to visit my astounding blog. He told me to fuck off - actually he told me to bare my well-greased asshole next time I see a rhino and wait for it to shove its horn up my well-greased asshole and then ride it all the way to Zimbabwe. Arthur is funny like that, always saying nasty things to me like he doesn't love me or something. "sigh".
So I asked my dirty daddy when he left the goats alone for a few minutes and he said fuck off too, but after I cried he slapped me and said put in a post with words that people will search for on the Goggles search engine. Then he slapped me again, -and again, then he got a stick and I ran away....
So I thought what words do people look up on the internets mostest. Sex, women, Michael Jackson, ufos, beer, dope, Methodism and LOL cats. I thought to myself.
So I created a little story. Ahem, 'While drinking some beer Michael Jackson saw a ufo. he knew it was real because he didn't have any dope. Going onto the ufo some aliens were seen by Michael Jackson fucking small holes cut in photographs of Lady Gaga, Britney Spears and Kate Smith. Micheal Jackson said "If any LOL cats were practicing methodists they would be outraged at this weird alien sex with pictures of famous women." but the aliens ignored him and said, "we have been drinking beer and smoking dope, and doing heroin, cocaine, lsd, amphetamines, hash, nitrous oxide, mushrooms and pills. Like what skating teens do in America." Michael Jackson shrugged, took a photograph of the Jonas Brothers away before it could be indecently violated and left the ufo, finished drinking his beer and returned to Neverland and vowed he would never mention it to anyone, especially Madonna.'
Now all I has to do is let a web crawler crawl all over that and I shall have thousands upon thousands of hits every hour. Gosh my prose is Nobel standard and my teachers said I was hopeless before they chased me out of school last year. Just shows them!
So I asked my dirty daddy when he left the goats alone for a few minutes and he said fuck off too, but after I cried he slapped me and said put in a post with words that people will search for on the Goggles search engine. Then he slapped me again, -and again, then he got a stick and I ran away....
So I thought what words do people look up on the internets mostest. Sex, women, Michael Jackson, ufos, beer, dope, Methodism and LOL cats. I thought to myself.
So I created a little story. Ahem, 'While drinking some beer Michael Jackson saw a ufo. he knew it was real because he didn't have any dope. Going onto the ufo some aliens were seen by Michael Jackson fucking small holes cut in photographs of Lady Gaga, Britney Spears and Kate Smith. Micheal Jackson said "If any LOL cats were practicing methodists they would be outraged at this weird alien sex with pictures of famous women." but the aliens ignored him and said, "we have been drinking beer and smoking dope, and doing heroin, cocaine, lsd, amphetamines, hash, nitrous oxide, mushrooms and pills. Like what skating teens do in America." Michael Jackson shrugged, took a photograph of the Jonas Brothers away before it could be indecently violated and left the ufo, finished drinking his beer and returned to Neverland and vowed he would never mention it to anyone, especially Madonna.'
Now all I has to do is let a web crawler crawl all over that and I shall have thousands upon thousands of hits every hour. Gosh my prose is Nobel standard and my teachers said I was hopeless before they chased me out of school last year. Just shows them!
Friday, July 10, 2009
Asshole Greasing
I have been asked by many, many interested persons about asshole greasing. So I told him, my bestest buddy on the internets of all time, Arthur the Wonderful, introduced me to this marvelous personal habit.
I now regularly grease my own asshole, and the assholes of my family and friends, and anyone else I can pin down, with either lard, butter or my own spittle.
Now, some people believe we are a cult because we wear magenta robes with the seat of the trousers cut out, gather under a full moon, paint our faces with ash and butter and inspect each others assholes and chant until dawn once a month, but we are not some bunch of wackos. This is all beneficial for the rectum and the nerves.
Not one of our members has died EVER of the terrible disease of xeroanus (itchy dry asshole).
I hope one day to become Grand Rectumartus of the Asshole Greasers Society and be invested with the silver paper sash, gilded toilet brush and platinum ballcock of office.
For full instructions on the proper greasing of the asshole write to me at christopherkabila@ymail.com.
And for you animal lovers out there my dirty daddy says goats love to have their assholes greased as well. I cannot say the same for my tom cat, Mugu, who scratched the fucking bejesus out of me when i tried to improve his dumb feline life. Ungrateful fucking cat!
I now regularly grease my own asshole, and the assholes of my family and friends, and anyone else I can pin down, with either lard, butter or my own spittle.
Now, some people believe we are a cult because we wear magenta robes with the seat of the trousers cut out, gather under a full moon, paint our faces with ash and butter and inspect each others assholes and chant until dawn once a month, but we are not some bunch of wackos. This is all beneficial for the rectum and the nerves.
Not one of our members has died EVER of the terrible disease of xeroanus (itchy dry asshole).
I hope one day to become Grand Rectumartus of the Asshole Greasers Society and be invested with the silver paper sash, gilded toilet brush and platinum ballcock of office.
For full instructions on the proper greasing of the asshole write to me at christopherkabila@ymail.com.
And for you animal lovers out there my dirty daddy says goats love to have their assholes greased as well. I cannot say the same for my tom cat, Mugu, who scratched the fucking bejesus out of me when i tried to improve his dumb feline life. Ungrateful fucking cat!
My Important Friends
Hi again. Just taking a break from scamming the nice people who live at the other end of the internet cable.
You know, I am a very lucky lad. I have received emails from many important peoples. Wow it does make me feel like a VIP!
Here is a selection:
Saturday, 2 May, 2009 2:15 PM
Sunday, 3 May, 2009 9:47 AM
Saturday, 9 May, 2009 2:12 PM
Monday, 11 May, 2009 10:43 AM
Christopher Kabila!!!
you are being a shithead by not sending me any nice nude photos of your willy! I demand that you send me pictures immediately, including your nutsack.
As Pope I expect all young men to flash their willys my way.
You must also say 5 Hail Marys and spend two minutes flagellating yourself.
Also stop conversing with Arthur , as he is a satanist.
From your master;
Pope Benedict XVI
Friday, 15 May, 2009 11:39 AM
You know, I am a very lucky lad. I have received emails from many important peoples. Wow it does make me feel like a VIP!
Here is a selection:
DEAR SMELLY PERSON - A MESSAGE FROM QUEEN ELIZABETH
To:christopherkabila@ymail.com
| Dear common rogue I have been asked to communicate with you and I am reliably informed that you an ignorant and smelly fellow with no future. I am very rich and powerful so it sucks to be you. I suggest you feed your worthless carcass to the lions. Regards, Elizabeth R. |
BONJOUR FROM NICHOLAS SARKOZY
To: christopherkabila@ymail.com
My dear friend, Allow me to introduce myself. I am Nicholas Sarkozy, President of France and married to a very hot wife. I want to urge you to grease your asshole. We in France believe that it is absolutely vital to grease the asshole daily. I would like to see the guillotine used on any anti-asshole-greasers who dare to raise their heads in public! If you have any questions do not bother me with them fucker as I am a very busy and important man with many assholes to grease. Regards from Nick the Frog. |
HELLO FROM BILL CLINTON
To: christopherkabila@ymail.com
| Dear Mr. Kabila It is indeed an honor to write you this email and I trust that you and your family are well. As you may be aware the plight of transvestites in Togo is causing immense soul-searching the world over. As a man inclined to the cause of transvestism I implore you to open your wallet and send what donation you can to the Transvestites In Togo Suffering (TITS) charity. Donations of $500 and $1,000 are the usual amounts donated by kind people, but many feel encouraged to give sums of $5,000 or $10,000. I am certain that your generosity will exceed this. Hilary will be over in Africa to check the situation for herself soon and if you become a registered donor she will drop by and flash a bit of ass your way. Please send money to P.O. Box 419, Lome, Togo. Thanks, Bill Clinton, 42nd President of the USA. |
YOU THERE SHITHEAD?
To: christopherkabila@ymail.com
you are being a shithead by not sending me any nice nude photos of your willy! I demand that you send me pictures immediately, including your nutsack.
As Pope I expect all young men to flash their willys my way.
You must also say 5 Hail Marys and spend two minutes flagellating yourself.
Also stop conversing with Arthur , as he is a satanist.
From your master;
Pope Benedict XVI
OOOH, THAT'S NASTY. EMAIL FROM CLEVELAND BROWN
To: christopherkabila@ymail.com
| Hi neighbour, my name is Cleveland Brown. I have been asked to write to you by Arthur because Arthur wants to know why you won't send him pictures of yourself wearing frilly girls underwear. As my friend Glenn Quagmire would say Giggedy giggedy giggedy. So be a pal and send those nasty photos to Arthur so he can beat his meat. And remember to grease your own asshole every day. Thanks. Cleveland. |
Thursday, July 9, 2009
Neat Blogspot
I used to think a blogspot was that sticky damp stain on my jocks.
I have always been a simpleton.
But anyway, I is learning.
Here is a blogspot which has examples of the work of me and my pals in the scam-cafe. Check it out.
http://419mail.blogspot.com
I have always been a simpleton.
But anyway, I is learning.
Here is a blogspot which has examples of the work of me and my pals in the scam-cafe. Check it out.
http://419mail.blogspot.com
Email me!
I do want to hear from all my friends.
Please email me at this address.
I await your emails avidly.
Must go now and grease my buttocks.
Please email me at this address.
I await your emails avidly.
Must go now and grease my buttocks.
My dirty daddy.
This is a photo of some guy in Nigeria who was caught doing to goats what my dirty daddy does to goats. He apparently had to marry the goat. My dirty daddy says he would rather marry a smelly old goat than my smelly old momma.
My friend wishes me well.
I received this congratulations from Arthur the Wonderful on my snazzy new blog!
"Dear Stinkybum,
I am so pleased that you decided to launch a blog and let the whole world know all about you and your dreadful family. I hope many, many people read it and send you warm wishes.
P.s. I don't care about the cocoa merchant who got poisoned or the bank error in my favour. Please shut up about them!
Love, Arthur the Wonderful"
I am in love with Arthur. Oh, I am very gay. My favourite blogspots are the ones with pictures of nude men. Hmmmm. My dirty daddy wishes there were blogs with pictures of pretty goats.
"Dear Stinkybum,
I am so pleased that you decided to launch a blog and let the whole world know all about you and your dreadful family. I hope many, many people read it and send you warm wishes.
P.s. I don't care about the cocoa merchant who got poisoned or the bank error in my favour. Please shut up about them!
Love, Arthur the Wonderful"
I am in love with Arthur. Oh, I am very gay. My favourite blogspots are the ones with pictures of nude men. Hmmmm. My dirty daddy wishes there were blogs with pictures of pretty goats.
Hi, I'm Christopher Kabila.
Hello and welcome to my blog. My name is Christopher Kabila.
I live with my family in a hovel. We are a family of 5. The head of our house is my dirty daddy. He mostly gets drunk and pesters goats. My momma is very ugly. She stays inside most days, if she goes out she wears a paper bag over her face. Not the same paper bag because they usually throw themselves into the fire rather than have to go anywhere near her ghastly face.
My sister Felicia is very cute but she is a prostitute and sells herself for a few coins outside the local internet cafe. I wish she would give her love to one man alone, I get very jealous when I see her with johns.
My younger brother is retarded. He mostly walks into walls, dribbles and reads Republican party speeches. We are all ashamed of him.
I am not a jobless boy! I am a guyman. I scam money out of people [mugus] on the internet all the time. My email address is christopherkabila@ymail.com - perhaps you have already received email from me and sent me money. Thank$ for that $ucker$!
My best friends include Arthur the Wonderful, Hugo Vagina, Gonorrhea Swatbottom, Rev. Cheeseprong, Liberace Hitler, Georgy Porgy and Erasmus Pong.
I am going to let the world know of my amazing exploits and share lovely emails that I receive from my dear friends. I will also post photos of exciting things like goats, axles and rust.
Please email me because I get lonely telling fibs to defraud people. I would love to hear your comments. Email me now!
I live with my family in a hovel. We are a family of 5. The head of our house is my dirty daddy. He mostly gets drunk and pesters goats. My momma is very ugly. She stays inside most days, if she goes out she wears a paper bag over her face. Not the same paper bag because they usually throw themselves into the fire rather than have to go anywhere near her ghastly face.
My sister Felicia is very cute but she is a prostitute and sells herself for a few coins outside the local internet cafe. I wish she would give her love to one man alone, I get very jealous when I see her with johns.
My younger brother is retarded. He mostly walks into walls, dribbles and reads Republican party speeches. We are all ashamed of him.
I am not a jobless boy! I am a guyman. I scam money out of people [mugus] on the internet all the time. My email address is christopherkabila@ymail.com - perhaps you have already received email from me and sent me money. Thank$ for that $ucker$!
My best friends include Arthur the Wonderful, Hugo Vagina, Gonorrhea Swatbottom, Rev. Cheeseprong, Liberace Hitler, Georgy Porgy and Erasmus Pong.
I am going to let the world know of my amazing exploits and share lovely emails that I receive from my dear friends. I will also post photos of exciting things like goats, axles and rust.
Please email me because I get lonely telling fibs to defraud people. I would love to hear your comments. Email me now!
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